Yes God I’ll follow you…(as long as it’s easy)
Unfortunately, I find this is the way following God works for me.
Yes, God I’ll follow you. This is an exciting and excellent plan! What could be better than what you have for me God? Absolutely nothing. Because I love you God and I’m so grateful for all your incredible promises in the bible. I believe them all God and I’m just so thankful. I can look back at how you’ve fulfilled those promises to me and that gives me such confidence. This is such a joyful and glorious way to live God. I’m remembering all of your wonderful blessings to me. This is just amazing God. I love following you. I will always follow you.
But…WAIT…God, now there’s a problem/ issue/ circumstance and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to fix this God. This could become a total mess if this doesn't quickly get rectified. This looks impossible God. How in the world can this be resolved? This needs a solution ASAP God. What is the solution? I don't see a good outcome to this. This is scary. There are WAY too many unknowns in the future now. This must get dealt with very soon or it could be horrible for me. Actually, it’s mandatory this get handled right now. Imagine all the possible disasters that may come from this God. Everything is about to get even worse if this doesn't get fixed right away. I need a solution God. And fast. What should I do God?
Actually God I really don't believe what you promise is true. I only believe what you say when its easy for me. When I can clearly see the outcome and be assured everything is going to be ok. Only when I can know all the answers ahead of time will I believe and truly trust in your word and follow you.
Wait, surely I love God more than that? Surely I would NEVER actually say that to God.
But the reality is I really don't have to say it because my actions show it. What I do shows what I truly believe. Who will I to choose to follow? Will I let my feelings rule my heart and actions? Will my past experiences, logic, and my pride get to take first priority?
Yes.
My way seems much safer.
I’m going to choose…My ideas. My thoughts. My plans. My solutions. My ways. My opinions. I’ll make a plan. I’ll get started right away.
Good, I’m feeling much better now.
Wait, a bible verse is coming to my mind. God are you trying to tell me something?
Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths”
This verse is quite clear. It couldn’t be more clear. God, now what do I do? I do want to follow you. I do believe your word. I know it is infallible. I do love you with all my heart. I can’t believe I would even think all those sinful prideful things I said before. Because I know deep in my heart how dedicated I am to following you God. Praise you for showing me the truth. I’m so grateful your word is so clear. I do trust you.
I’m feeling much better now God.
I’m sure you can clearly see…there’s quite a battle happening.
In my mind I’ve played out both options.
So who will I choose?
Me or God?
Me.
Wow, that was a fast response. And sadly I can tell you most of my life that’s been the answer.
Even now as a believer I struggle to not answer that way so quickly. Following God takes the strength of the Holy Spirit in me. I’d love to say I’m strong and can do this on my own…but I cannot. And I have not. I can only do this through the strength of God. Through the Holy Spirit working in me to literally save me from myself.
And look at all the confusing feelings happening as well. I can feel both…good following myself…good following God. It depends on who I’m listening to. Thankfully, God ends the confusion and makes it crystal clear. As God’s child, I’m not commanded to act on my feelings. Whether they be good or bad, they are not the basis for my actions. Only God’s word is the basis for my actions. I’m commanded to follow God’s word period. And as I said earlier, my actions (and even thoughts) show who I’m really following. This isn’t easy for me. But I’m not promised easy. I’m promised what is in God’s word for me. And my feelings are not part of God’s commands for my actions.
The conclusion:
Praise Jesus as a believer I’m given the strength to follow God’s word. I do not have to attempt to do this on my own.
So perhaps I should change the title of this entry…
Yes God I’ll follow you…(as long as I rely on your strength)
So here it is.
Blog entry Three.
Follow God and Bake from your Heart,
Ellie